Evidently
Genevieve came one morning to court,
Testified against one who’d extort.
To the judge she displayed
The main tools of her trade.
(Don’t you see? She’s a well-paid escort).
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(Source: charleswhiskey)
Another customer was arriving imminently, but this one wasn’t quite finished:
Old Faithful
Quite soon Jenny’s next guest would be showing,
So she said, “Really, you must be going.”
Pleasures blazed, meteoric,
Making him so euphoric
That his semen just wouldn’t stop flowing.
My daily blog is now a book! Get 200 more randy rhymes in Lusty Limericks, Volume 1!
(Source: longmanrising)
Assistance
Jenny’s date just could not get erect.
Her Viagra had zero effect.
Jenny, ever persistent
Fetched her tiny assistant.
This problem he could quickly correct.
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From the Jenny’s Date series.
(Source: danishprinciple)
Anonymous asked: could we submit our own pictures for limericks?
Absolutely! Your photos and suggestions are welcome.
Cygnet-ure
Jenny’s date was a charmer named Don.
Their agenda was always forgone:
He’d pull up in his truck,
A quick ten-minute fuck.
And his wiener looked just like a swan.
From the Jenny’s Date series.
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Bobbed
If my penis fell off from abuse,
Certainly I would have no excuse.
I would send it to Jenny.
She says she loves it plenty.
I would hope she’d put it to good use.
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Dirty Copper
Jenny’s date was an off-duty cop.
They role played a routine traffic stop.
“Please don’t give me a ticket…”
“Take your dick out - I’ll lick it!”
It’s how he always gets his first pop.
From the Jenny’s Date series.
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Lusty Limericks honors Masturbation Monday
My New Toy
Bought a new masturbation device.
The soft squishy tunnel feels nice.
But the lips can’t compare,
To Jenny’s luscious pair.
Thinking of her just made me come twice.
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Inspired by my remarkable friend bjaddict:
Sisterly Love
Next to me, my adoring wife slept.
To our room her hot kid sister crept.
Sis proceeded to show me
How an expert would blow me.
By comparison, my wife’s inept.
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(Source: ladynabua)
Overcompensation
Since my dick was so small and pathetic,
Had one made from a space-age synthetic.
It invites conversation,
But has one limitation:
She can’t take it without anesthetic.
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